Boobs! and Greasy Hair

Toddlers are amazing. They have the ability to steal your heart and make you crazy in one breath. Mine are no exception. S is hilarious. Some of the stuff that comes out of that kid’s mouth is just incredible. Like bedtime tonight, I shit you not, she belted out the ENTIRE star spangled banner- “through the perilous fight” and all. 

Yesterday, when I got her up, I was admittedly a hot mess. I got up to get some work done before the feral kitten kids could give me a run for my money. I threw some leggings and a sweatshirt on and got to it. I crammed and didn’t think twice about what I looked like.  Once they got up, I got to S and she was so incredibly sweet. I scooped her out of her crib (praise Jesus, she is still in a crib!) and she gave me a huge hug. I sat in her chair, and she grabbed both sides of my face and planted a huge kiss on me and hugged me. I about died. Then, she pulled away from the hug, hands back on my cheeks, and looked me up and down. She goes “Mama, whats on your hair?” I shook my head and ran my fingers through my (unclean) hair. “Nothing, baby.” I said. “No, mama, something all over your hair!”. Well, shit. My almost three year old pointed out that my hair was greasy. Good lord. I need a shower. I hope she doesn’t tell her preschool teachers that mama has something all over her hair. Who am I kidding? Everyone in the entire zip code of 60047 would know that my hair was a hot mess as I glistened up Quinten road in Bertha. So I showered. Eventually. Within 24 hours at least. 

Today was long, and I was really tired. After dinner, I sat at the table and put S on my lap facing me. She gave me a huge hug and then grabbed the neck of my crew neck T-shirt. She peeked down it and asked what was there. I replied “My tank top”. She looked further and I made the mistake of asking her “What are you looking for, silly”. Straight up, my almost three year old daughter looks right at me and goes “Your BOOOOBS! HAHAHA!”. I again, about died. Where did she learn this from? I had to laugh. Kid, you are a TRIP. Like, what else would she be looking for? 

This entire week, she wore a necklace that she chose from Claire’s last week while shopping with my mom. The necklace (of all things she could pick) was a pendant with a hot pink sloth eating a piece of pizza on it. (Sidenote: Who is the buyer at Claire’s?) She will tell anyone who comes by her that her necklace is a “sloth eating pizza”! She truly owns her eccentric side!

Besides the aforementioned sweetness meets honest, what I have also learned about toddlers in the past couple months is the following: 

1. They hear EVERYTHING. And repeat it. “Mama no happy at doggie” and worse. 

2. Unconditional Love. They really don’t care if my hair is greasy or I look like a hot mess. She still hugged me the same and loved on me like everyday. 

3. They test, test, and test. Its up to you whether the manipulation is minor or major. (S threw some very small toys in a pee filled toilet this morning to see what I would do. “Mama, you get them later”. That’s a whole different post.

4. They are fleeting. Someday, I won’t get those face smushing hugs every morning and the silliness of a toddler who is so excited that I organized all of her stuffed animals in her bed. 

5. They have the ability to manipulate their bodies into positions that make it impossible for you to strap them in a carseat, carry them, or put articles of clothing on them. As noted in the picture of B stiff boarding me today. 

6. But man, those tiny dictators really have that ability to make you feel every emotion humanly possible within a very short moment. The days are long, but man, these years are SO short.